Hey

I've tried for the past week and a half to sit down and write this, and each time I've had to get up and walk away. This really fucking hurts. My dear friend, Doug Moore, aka Movie Club Doug, died Thursday before last, August 28, at home, from cancer.

Doug, who was mentioned in here with great frequency going back to day one (I think the only photos of him are in King Of The Wild Frontier), was diagnosed with kidney cancer last November. There was a brief respite after the kidney was removed when it was hoped he was going to be okay. In January he was found to have cancer in both lungs and it was pretty much downhill from there.

I could write a million words and it wouldn't come close to expressing what Doug meant to me, or how much I'm going to miss him. Doug had been an important part of my life since we met and became friends the summer of 1980- I was 23, Doug, 21- and he hung with me and had my back from that day forward, through thick and some very serious thin. All of my old friends are precious to me, and one of the reasons I love them so much is that they are all unique. I'll never have another friend like Doug in this lifetime.

I spoke at his memorial service last Wednesday, and it was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, though I was told it came across "eloquent and heartfelt". Been keeping up appearences in public- kind of hard to console the widow and family when you're visibly torn down yourself, not to mention I have an image to uphold- but in private this has me pretty much gutted. I'll be a long time getting over this.

(DON'T GUESS I'LL EVER SEE HIM AGAIN)

Probably not where you're going, no.

(THINK YOU WILL?)

I'm hoping there's nothing after this. If there is . . . I imagine I have a seat reserved next to you.

(MAYBE HE CAN PUT IN GOOD WORD A FOR US)

I'm sure he'll do what he can.

Joe's going to include Doug's obituary on the site.

Later