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Parent/Teacher Conferences (Parent Tips)

© Deborah Jeter

Teachers, if you don't mind, I'd like to bring to the "table" a discussion that is directed toward the parents. You could be involved somewhere along the line with the need for this type of information, but my main objective in this article is to offer some general tips and experienced advice for those incidences that occur involving miscommunication and appropriate protocol.

Finger pointing in this day and age has become common place. While this may make one feel better at the time, it does little to rectify a problem. When we assume we know what the problem is rather than take the action to investigate and get the facts, we usually end up with "mud on our face" because as we all know, there are always two sides to any story. There is an appropriate way to proceed in any investigation but in school oriented situations, this particular procedure seems to work the best in most instances.

1. You will most likely hear the first complaint from your child. Listen, ask questions and verify or clarify what you think you are hearing. These discussions are very important and should be held every day. It shows your child that you care about his or her daily affairs. The best time for these discussions, of course, is when you are feeling able and ready to really listen. It is not a good idea to get into any kind of "important issue" if you are hurried, stressed, frustrated from your day's work, tired or before you've had that morning cup of coffee. ;-)

2. After you have gathered the "facts" or at least have the understanding of what your child "believes" are the facts and find that you are perturbed at something that has occured at school, then it's time to go to the next step. Call the teacher first. Arrange a meeting with the teacher at school or if that is not possible, speak with him or her on the phone. Now you are gathering the other side of the story.

3. If, after speaking with the teacher, you are still not pleased with the information relayed, arrange a meeting with the principal. This needs to be done in person and it is best to have the teacher and maybe even your child present. Things rarely need to progress (or digress) to the level of the superintendent after a meeting with the principal. But if that should be warranted, then that would be the final step and further action could be discussed with him or her.